It’s my wife’s birthday today. I took my sons to a store and we got her a few things. Fabian bought some icing and decorated his ginger bread cookies for all 4 family members. I think that made my wife happy.
But yesterday wasn’t a good day. I can see that she raises her voice, not scream, but raising voice. I think that always backfires. They react the same way to her. She think I undermine her in front of them. I don’t. I tell her that she’s breaking our “no screaming” rules. But she is cooking inside and doesn’t care.
I realized something this year. It feels like not being allowed to scream takes away your main weapon. You have to find something else, though. But the bottom line it forces you to treat your family members with more respect. That’s what happened to me. I feel much different now around my wife and my kids. And that’s a big win!