Blog

I got back from Poland on Saturday. I enjoyed the visit very much. But not as much as last year. Things have to change a great deal before I consider going back. By going back, I mean going back permanently. It’s not easy to compare US and Poland, but after 15 years in the US, I am sort of used to the way things are here. And a lot of things are the way they should be.
But I did enjoy the visit. Krakow and Zakopane are great. My area near Niedzica is also great. Things are changing. It takes time, but I do see improvement.
I need to get back to my old way of doing and a focus on improvement. I need to start waking up at 5:30 again. I need to start reading in the morning. I need to write my goals before I go to sleep. And I need to try to be in bed before 10:30PM.
I have quite a few books to read and I need to start reading!

I have 4 days to go before I leave for vacation. I am excited. I miss my son. I miss my wife. I don’t really like being alone. There is nothing really wrong with it. It’s jus that it’s better to be with my family. Simple as that.
I am having some determination issues again. I am not finding enough time for reading. I am not going to sleep when I feel tired. I don’t like that. I need to be more disciplined. I need to do what I have to do: get some rest so I can wake up rested and have the energy and open mind to improve my development skills. One of the things I will have to do is stop watching TV in the morning. That seems to be taking a lot of my time.
Going to sleep before 11. Waking up before 6. No TV in the morning. Sounds like a plan? You bet!

It’s one week to go and I am starting to miss my family more and more. I would love to spend some quality time with my son. I would like to take him to a store. I would like to take him outside and play with him. I would like to take him to Starbucks. He really likes to play on Route 17. He has plenty of space there. I have the time to drink my coffee and he has the time to play over there. It’s really enjoyable. I love it.
I miss my wife as well. She helps me a lot. Plus, I feel a bit lonely. It’s especially lonely on a weekend. I don’t like to spend too much time alone. I would rather have them inhouse. Of course, occassions where she overreacts are in my head, but she’ll get over it eventually. Why can’t we be friends?! I think we can and we will.

My wife has been gone for over a week now. 🙁 I miss my son. I miss my wife as well. I just want to have everyone at home and enjoy it. I hear he is developing nicely over in Poland. He is watching the girls and tries to do thing that they’re doing. I hear kids are developing in that regard. There is a lot of peer pressure. Can kids have peer pressure? Apparently so!
I noticed one other thing. It’s about my goals. I know that if I write it down the night before, I will have bigger determination to actually do it in the morning. This is especially true for my “become an early riser” goal. Anytime I write it down, I actually do it.
It seems to me that I have lost some of my focus to stay sharp. I’ve lost it and I’m no longer as determined to accomplish my goals. It’s probably because I have not been writing them as agressively as before. I should be writing them every day just before I go to sleep. It looks like the process of writing it down works like wonders.

My wife is going to Poland tomorrow. I am a bit scared. I love my son and she is taking him away from me for roughly a month. Whoa. I remember that I could not hold it off when I was leaving him in Poland last year. I imagine it is going to be similar this time. It is going to be easier a bit, as I will be expecting the time that I go and visit them. But just thinking about him now, I am going to miss his smiles, his playing time, and I will just miss him for all the things that I want to do with him. I took him to Starbux on Saturday. We stayed inside the shop for almost half and hour. He just liked to play. He kept telling me “tatus, kawa.” He kept reminding me that I should be drinking my coffee. He’s so much fun. I realize it and think about him when I’m at work. He’s developing in a great way. He’s a good boy overall. Pretty smart boy I think. It’s hard to say whether he’ll be really smart or not, but he picks things up quickly, I think. He’s stubborn, that’s for sure. He keeps crying every night when we brush his teeth. Even though it does not hurt him! Same when my sister cuts his hair. And he is also not a great eater, but got better lately. All in all, he’s the one thing that is really precious in my heart.

1. I am an agressive learner by the end of 2008a. I read 1-2 books every monthb. I read books for 1-2 hours every day
2. I am an early riser by the end of summer 2008.a. I wake up before 6 every day
3. I am a plorific worker by the end of 2008.
4. I speak with confidence and energy by the end of 2008.
5. I look forward to improve my skills at work by the end of 2008.
6. I practice new skills at work every week by the end of 2008.
7. I have a great energy at work by the end of 2008.

Things are starting to heat up again at work. I am fairly occupied and that’s a great thing. I love working in New York. We’ll be moving to a more central place in NY. I think it should be fun. There will be more tourists there, but I think I can live with that. In any case, do I have a say? Not really. We’ll see, I think it will be a good change.
I am thinking of having a reward system for myself. I will buy something for myself if I do the right thing. It should motivate me to achieve my goals. I can really help myself drive faster in the direction I want to go. I will try that for a month or so!

I dived in today and bought a camera. We have had our Canon for a few years now and it recently broke. Since my wife has been wanting an DSLR for some time, I decided to do some research and possibly purchase a camera like that. I zoomed in on XSi from Canon, but today while browsing a Consumer Reports magazine, I found a Olympus E510. I looked at the reviews online and they were amazing. People love this camera. And it was $250 less than the XSi! That’s all I needed to get me conviced. I dived in and bought a camera! It’s supposed to arrive late, probably just days before my wife leaves, but I am really excited. I know she’s going to be excited as well! There is a new version of it coming out soon, but I will most likely not sell it in Poland. We’ll see. If somebody gives me hundred or hundred fifty more, then I will have to really think about it!

Poland is not having too much luck in big soccer championships. They just cannot win in big tournaments. Today, playing Austria and they’re up 1:0 till the 92 minute. Then there is a penalty kick and they lose! I did not think there was a faul there, but the referee thought otherwise and Poland tied the game. Really tough lack. I remember they lost the game in 87th minute with Germany two years ago. What is going on? Nothing really. Poland needs to start from the roots, from training the youth. That’s the only way we might be seeing some better results. As it is now, Poland will struggle. What I’m surprised, is how the hell Croatia and Czech Republic doing so well. They’re small countries but they have some great talent. I would like Beenhaker to stay but I doubt he’s going to be there for the World and the next Euro. I think he brought a lot of good things to the Polish team. They played well. I was proud of them. And I think that’s the important thing.

I am sometimes having issues with my wife. She gets upset if I try to do things. For instance, yesterday, when she knew I had to go to Toastmasters, she asked me if I could skip. I said I have to go. She got upset and started yelling at me. It got uncomfortable. Once she gets into that state, it’s really tough to argue with here. She cannot control herself. It’s really bad. If she could, she would throw things at me. Then in the morning, she’s said whether I should say sorry to her. Because I swore at the table. So I did. But it’s tough because I am not sure if she sees any wrongdoing herself. I doubt it.