My Learning Log

Tag: Fabian

  • daily learnings

    I learned a big lesson yesterday in logback config. As is the rule of debugging, check the simplest things first. I have been digging for a long period of time, in hopes to try to find something wrong with my configuration. I was buffled why it’s not picking up my config file. Guess what, IT WAS a simple thing. logback.xml was being overwritten by logback.xml. And logback was quiet about it. So frustrating. Lot of time wasted on this effort. But at least I learned something. Now I want to try re-directing to a rolling file.

    I learned another lesson. Maybe it wasn’t such a big learning, as I know that, but that’s something I need to change, so I am going to bang it anyway. My wife complaigned that I don’t organize anything, that she has to keep thinking of things to prepare, things to cook, where to go. I have got to find a way to be more proactive, to be more active, to be more involved. That’s one change I have to be more aggressive. In fact, I should make this my life-goal. Though, I’m not sure how to call it.

    My daily talks with my son might get boring. But I do enjoy him telling him my expecations. I enjoy challenging him. Knowing Fabian, he needs that. Otherwise, he just slucks off. I want to teach him all the lessons I know. I’ve got to do that. My kids are my life.

  • learning to communicate with my son

    I think it’s too early to say whether my talking with Fabian is helping. I made it a goal to sit for a few minutes every day before night before school and go over how things are going, how he is behaving, and set some expectations. Eventually, if this is going to work out, I think I’m going to hear great stories on what he did, how the teacher react and so on.

    So far, I think it is working. It is brining me together with him. And it opened a level of communication that I never really had since I started going to work early. Doing it every night works well too.

  • daily meetings

    I am learning that my son Fabian is opening up to me at the table. He’s talking to me like I’ve never seen him before. And he was good in school on Tuesday. I am a bit worried that he might be immature, that he might be acting childish, that he might not be able to be the top performer. But I don’t control that. He does. And I can help him stay on track. 

    I gave him a challenge. I asked him to ask a question or two in school tomorrow. I want him to open up. I want him to not be shy, afraid. If he can do that, I think that’s going to be a big improvement. 

    I need him to focus, to keep wanting to learn. I change his way in how he approaches learning. I want to help him.

    I talk to him daily during the week. I will set the expecations for him. I am going to try to motivate him. I hope this will work. This is a new thing I’m doing with him. Something new I learned and I hope will work.

  • talking to fabian

    My son had an incident yesterday. The teacher said he’s acting immature or doesn’t know what’s going on. My wife called me and told me about it. That got me worried. I don’t want my son to be labeled “slow” or “immature” or “so so.” It also got me thinking that we might need to leave him for another year.

    So I came home and I acted calm. As if nothing happened. Then, when Fabian wanted to play downstairs. I told him I want to talk to him. I took him upstairs and we sat at the big dining table. And we talked. He was explaining his situation as it happened. It doesn’t appear that anything big happened. Just minor miscommunication, perhaps. I told him my expecations. I told him this behaviour is unnacceptable. I told him to ask questions. Fabian took it well, I said we will talk every day.

    I learned that by talking and getting into other’s point of view, I can get my message across. Hitting and yelling is probably not the way to go.

  • today

    Some resistance to doing the best possible job? Perhaps. But is that abnormal? Probably not. On the positive side, I am focusing on work related tasks. That’s a nice change from my previous jobs. I do work and dev related tasks pretty much all the time. That’s a big accomplishment.

    I should also focus on being more plorific. On any task. I have some work to do in that regard. But things will improve as I gain more and more understanding.

    I did raised my voice today during a meeting. That’s a good thing. I need to do that more often. I do feel some nervousness. Not really sure why. I need to attack the feast so it’s gone. How? I need to force myself to getting rid of the fear. Keep attacking it. Keep fighting it. And I will overcome it. Making a mistake is nothing. I should make more.

    My wife told me a scary thing. She lost Fabian. Oh, no. Something struck my heart. SHe did lose him at the Bergen mall. He got away and went to Whole Foods. She looked around with no luck. That was really, really scary! But she eventually found him.

    Gotta run. NJ Transit alert.

  • today; motivation; fabian

    Wasting time is a very big thing for me. I easily waste a lot of time doing things that are not important. I easily get distracted. Not the best thing to do.

    I need to do manage my time better. Much better.

    Yesterday, I said that I will start waking up at 5:30am and no TV in the morning. I followed up and delivered today. No TV in the morning. It’s tempting. I would love to see and check out what’s going on. But when I do that, I don’t get to read my motivational things, like quotes, like my kindle.

    I need to force myself to do the things that are not comfortable for me. This is going to be a challenge. A real one. A really, really big one. But I can do that. Why? Because it’s good for me. It’s what I NEED to do. And it’s great to change things up and do the things that make me better.

    I think I have the tools required to do it. I think I have the motivation to do it. That’s who I am. That’s why I have been successful in my professional life. I have been moving up every year. I have been learning a lot every year. I need to keep doing that.

    Fabian
    My son Fabian is not listening. He is playing tough with my wife. She doesn’t have a lot of control over him. I think he needs to be kept on a short leash. I know it’s tough. I have to learn a lot. My wife has to learn a lot as well. I keep telling her daily. I found a few books that should help me. I need to read them. I also need to document what I learn so I can remember and apply it later on, if need to.

    One thing I told my wife today is that she shouldn’t always start with a NO. She should set some rules and then rewards based on whether he does them. If not, still reward others. Also, after she sees that he did something right, compliment and reward him! It’s a work in progress.

  • party

    We had a great party on Saturday. Really. I know I’m not objective, but it was one of the best Christening parties I’ve been to. And a lot of people were saying that when they were leaving. Even my mom said that the DJ got everyone involved. That the cake was really really good. That the Cocktail Hour was really good. My uncle said that it’s worth paying $20 more per person.

    I think so too. Party at The Bethwood is worth it. Next time I am going to try to get the Seville. I think that’s the best room they have. Really nice. The one we had, Chestnut, was not bad, either. So all in all, it was as we had imagined or dreamed of.

    My wife really deserves an award for this. She pretty much setup everything. Excellent job by her.

    And Victor was great. My son Fabian needs to be held on a closer leash. He really is causing us more and more trouble. Not sure if that’s really him or if it’s the age, but it cannot continue. I need to find ways and mostly my wife in Poland to make him better. Otherwise, it’s just going to be difficult for us. And for him in the future.

  • fabian

    Fabian got a warning/timeout in school. He scratched Wiktoria and I think he hit Kacper. As a penalty, my wife did not allow to watch anything after school. He was so good in the evening because of it. It was a nice lesson for him.

    I think he’s a shy boy. It takes time for him to actually get comfortable in a new environment. But after he gets comfortable, ,I think he’s competitive.

    For instance, when he starts swimming classes, he doesn’t even want to get into the water. But once he’s in, I think he’s one of the better guys there. He does very well! I am proud of him. It’s great to see.

    But since he’s a little bit shy, my wife and I need to encurage him to do things. We need to remind him to volunteer, to speak up, to be good. I think he’ll get it. Sooner or later he will.

    My wife likes Wiktor or Karol. They are polish names. I like Viktor, but I like Oscar better. Since she’s saying that I took the 1st name, I have to give in a little. But today, a thought came to me. Initially, I thought we’d have Stanley as the 2nd name, now I’m thinking we should name our boy Victor Oscar. I think this is a good combination. Why not Viktor? Yes, it’s more unique, but I’m not sure. I like the US names a bit better. And if we go to Poland, so what? Victor is a great name to have. And Oscar, very nice! Victor Oscar — very nice name indeed. Now I just need to convince my wife!

  • wordpress; fabian

    WordPress i much more robust and much faster blogging platform. It’s too bad I’ve been using MT for years, with deep linking in Google. But that just really means that I will have to work harder to convert. I think I should.

    One other thing I have to do is migrate to a different hosting company. I have a year or so for that. I wish I had something sooner, but it got renewed for another year and I don’t think I’ll get a refund.

    My son is developing really great. I think he’s going to be a leader. He likes to get challenged. Any time I say, you don’t know “…,” he rises up. Not only that, he wants me to say it again, and again. It’s really cool. This is how I’m challenging him. With that, he’s learning new letters. He almost knows all of them now! And we really just started learning them a few weeks ago. He’s also doing great in swimming classes. I get a sense that he might be starting slowly with some things, but as soon as he gets a bit comfortable, he rises up!