Author: SK

I feel a bit weird today. My wife took my son and went to work. She’ll come back home on Friday. Wow, that’s tough. I love Fabian. He is lots of fun. He can really make me forget about the outside world. I love it that he asks me to read for him. He really likes books. I think it’s exciting for him. He actually reads for himself a bit. He is making some funny noises. Plus, almost every day, he learns how to say a new word. It’s unbelievable how much fun he is. And the love I feel for him. It really shows when they leave town. Nostalgia really shows…
I think my ritual to wake up every morning at 5:30am is starting to work. I found out that to make myself wake up and not go back to sleep is to watch some TV right after I wake up. It’s giving me the motivation to wake up, and that’s great. But I have to watch so I don’t abuse it and start watching TV for a long time. It happens sometimes. I have to limit it to 5 or 10 minutes. But otherwise, watching TV in the morning is helping me wake up.

On a quiet day like today, I revert to my old days of doing things. Which really means that I not doing much. I don’t want to continue going down that path. I should be prepared for days like today. If I’m not that busy, or I’m having hard time trying to do some work, I should be doing more productive work. Searching for nba content or checking my email will not get me anywhere.
I placed an order for a GPS device and I’m a bit concerned. I placed it on one of the sites that I should have checked the reviews for. Only after I had placed the order did I decide to really read the reviews. That’s not a good way, and not a guaranteed way to get my goods delivered. I don’t really know what to do now. I will call them tomorrow and will see what they have to say. But I might have to cancel the order.
So this is a distraction, sure. But why I did I place an order duing work hours then? 🙂
I have 2 goals at work: being a plorific worker, and also finding the time that will help me become a better developer. I can find the time to do some dev work, or some reading, or just practicing or thinking about dev related stuff. Not on nba stuff. Really. It’s not going to get me anywhere.

I am a person that likes working alone. I am a person that would not go out of its way to meet people. I am not really social. But I want to be. I want to be able to meet with others. I want to be able to make new friends. I want to be able to go out with friends. So what should I do?
I think having a good social life is important. Not only am I able to learn something from others, but I’m also able to have some fun.
However, my idea of friendship is different than my wife’s. She really social. But sometimes I tell her that I don’t want to meet with somebody. She does not like that. What is better, Stas, staying home alone? I don’t think so. I think going out, with anybody, is better than staying home. So, unless I have a better alternative, I should not even open my mouth. As simple as that.
So how do I create new friends. That’s the hard part. I have to make the initial contact and then stick to it. I have to be able to call somebody and arrange a meeting. There is no other way. In any case, I have lots of work to do in this regard.

1. I am an agressive learner by the end of 2008.a. I read 1-2 hours every dayb. I take notes and try to understand what I readc. I write about what I read
2. I am a great software developer by the end of 2008.a. I practice what I learn constantlyb. I find time at work to get better as a developer
3. I am a confident communicator by the end of 2008.a. I look for opportunities to talkb. I am not afraid to look foolishc. I push myself to talk to others
4. I am a followed blogger by the end of 2008.a. I write a blog entry oftenb. I write about interesting stuff to me and to my readers
5. I am a good father and husband by the end of 2008.a. I take a vacation every 1-2 months
6. I am a good story teller by the end of 2008.a. I am looking forward to tell a storiesb. I look forward to going out for lunch with others
7. I know AJAX by heart by the end of 2008.

I am struggling to decide what type of content to put on the website. I am always wondering, should I post this, what is somebody else going to think, etc.
I think I have found some content category that I will be posting very often: notes from books that I read. This will be new stuff that I learned by reading this book.
I see a lot of benefit for me for posting this type of content. I am always going to have stuff to post. Why? I read constantly so the possibilities are almost endless. I am going to learn a bit deeper if I do this. I will have to summarize what I learned. I will have to review the material that I learned.
By posting my learning from the books I am actually going to become a better developer. I am sure about that. Let the regular posting begin!

I am sometimes struggling to speak up. I am struggling to really raise my voice. Sometimes I have stuff to say but I just hide it. Well, not really hide it but I don’t really want to be rude and interrupt people. As a result, I don’t get to talk that much. And when I do get a chance, I speak fast and I feel some pressure. When I am speaking to other people, I don’t really maintain my eye contact well. The bottom line, it’s not really what I call being a good communicator. I noticed as well that I am afraid to ask if I am not sure about something. I don’t like the fact that people might think I’m slow or stupid.
I should be honest. If I’m going to continue like this, I’m not really going to get far. I can still be a programmer, but if I don’t find a way to be more outspoken, to be more agressive, I might be stuck in this position forever.
I don’t think I want that. And that means that I have to try to find ways to talk to more people. I just cannot shy away. I am sort of stuck thinking just about myself.
Just today, I got asked by Kathy if I have lunch and if want to go down to get something. I declined. Why? Not sure. It was just a reaction, I think. Or was I scared? I think it was the latter.

This environment at NBCU is more relaxing and not as stressful as some of my previous places I had work for. I share an office with one other guy. It’s definitely more personal and I can get a chance, if I want, to read and develop something on my own. I still have to figure out how to reach my personal domains, but even if I have to test locally, should be good enough. I’ve been saying this throughout, I want to keep an edge and stay on top. I want to be fresh, constantly learning, and constantly practicing. I want to be writing utilities and applications on my own. I want to simplify my life and I want to keep getting better. The only way I’m going to do that if I feel internally that I am doing this: that’s how I gain and keep confidence. And this place here is a good shop to do that. At least for now. There is risk, of course. One risk is that this place might fall apart because GE or NBCU does not want to give us money. But the likely scenario of that happening are fairly slim. We have a major project that we’re working on. This is something that will enable this startup to generate money. And if nothing else, we need this to work

I am reading a lot of books. But am I learning so, so much from them? I think I could do better. I think I could learn more if I try to summarize after I read the book. I should create a lessons-learned articles on my website where I would list what I learned. In fact, I think I’m going to start doing that. I have to extract more from my learning.
I also have to practice more. I should do it even it slows my reading. I should take my reading time and put it into practice time. This will enable me to really accelerate my learning. I shall find ways to do that.

I am starting to like this place. It may not be very technologically advanced as some of my previous companies. But I like the people. I get a lot more interaction going on during the day. Maybe not as much as I would like to, but a lot more than in previous places. I would like to become more involved myself. I just have to be active, look for opportunities to talk to other people. And just be a friendly person.
One of my big issues is me being shy. I have to work and fight to become more open. I want to become more outspoken. I cannot be afraid to look foolish or stupid. I believe that I can do these things here at NBCU.

Things are a bit disorganized here at NBC. A lot of people are not very detail oriented. Things are not done with real care. As a result, some users/customers complaign. An example is the newsletter I worked on. It was really rushed out the door. We could have done a better job testing it. We should have sent out test newsletter. We should have sent out various different newsletters for different stations. But hey, I’m not calling the shots.
I do notice that I am very detail oriented. I like when things work and are just perfect. I care about little details. They’re important for me. This bodes well for me. In the future, if I ever decide to change careers, I should keep this in mind.