I need to realize something. My kids are my life. Nothing else. I am sort of dissapointed on how I react with them when I have free time. I am really not happy how I stay passive when I am with them. I am really not happy with myself. I take my goals over theirs. I care about what I do rather than try to think where to take them, how to spend good time with them. This is really bad. It is really not the way I want to approach things. I need to change that.
Blog
-
few things to improve
I am big on learning. I am getting confirmation from others as well. So that’s good. I believe that I am. I have invested many years in learning. I have spent many hours learning. It’s something that’s in me. It’s something that I do on an ongoing basis. And I want to keep it that way. I want to keep learning. I want to keep getting better.
How do I get better?
I need to improve my eye contact.
I need to improve my ability to explain things well and clear, without rushing.
I need to be able to visualze things and draw things on the board.
These things are my immediate need. I need to practice and learn them. I need to do these things to get better.
Impossible? Not really. Hard? Yes.
-
leadership
I learning a lot yesterday.
A1 team is off to a good start. We’ve received a lot of praise yesterday. People have been very happy with what we delivered. I loved our performance as well. Now the hard part is continuing it. I believe we can do a good job easily. We can kick ass again. But this time, it’s more out of our control, as we’re dependent on ‘outside’ things.
I also learned that it feels good to praise people in front of others. I want to be doing more of it. I know it feels great to be praised by others. I know that feeling. But there is one key: it has to legitimate, sincere, and concrete. Missing one of these makes it much less effective.
I want my leadership style to be simple. I want people to know that I expect the best. I want people to know that I give them autonomy. I want people to know that I appreciate good effort. Try until you fail, then try again.
-
work, work, work
If I could, I would probably spend all of my time checking work email, doing some extra work. That is, when I get home!
I got 2 kids. That’s not acceptable. When I get home from work, I need to spend at least an hour with them. I need to teach them something. I need to show them something. I need to do a few projects with them. You see, I need to be involved with them!
I love my kids. I love my job. Which one is more important? There is no question about it. But I need to show it. All the time. Can’t ignore them.
-
victor and me
My son Victor is an intersting case. He picks things up very quickly. Yesterday night when he was putting puzzles together on of his puzzles fell on the floor. He said, “oh, frequent.” And then he said, “daddy, I said, oh frequent.” How funny is that?
I think learning wise he’s going to have it easy. Social wise, he’s going to have it tough. He likes to play by himself. He’s very individualistic. I do hope he plays with kids more and more as that will help him in life. I know if because Victor reminds me “myself.” I see a lot of him in him. Love that.
-
learning more
There is hope at the end of the tunnel. There is a green light after giving the best effort. I am seeing it. I am making some strides. I am getting better. One day at a time. One learning at a time. I will get there. Failure is not an option. I know my weak points. I know that if I get better in visualizing things, improving things, I will get better!
I have to be more agressive in raising things, raising issues. When I doubt something, I should raise it. I should not hold things in my own head. I have been doing that. I want to open up. I don’t want to have that feeling “is my question stupid.” No. Ask. I will work on that.
For now, keep digging.
-
learning better, learning harder
I learned some valuable lessons yesterday. When looking into issues, especially stability issues, every clue is important. Every clue should be checked. And little things, little warnings make a big difference. And saying “it’s hard” is not an option. keep diggin! Keep digging hard!
My domain knowledge on the prospect side is weak, weak, weak. How do I change that? Study, study, study. Study until I get it. That’s the only thing I can do.
Some days I feel that this management gig is working great. Sometimes I feel that I am stupid. I can do better than that. I can be a technical leader. I will try my best to succeed. I have till the end of the year to show that, or get out.
-
lots to learn
I learned that I want to learn Algorithms! And that is after watching only the intro video. I think it would be really helpful for my career. It should make me a better programmer. I should improve my logical thinking. I should improve my analytical thinking. It should refresh my fundamental knowledge!
I am already getting a nice mental exercise from teaching math at the polish school. It’s fun! It’s challenging as well.
On top of that, I need to learn hadoop/cassandra. I need to learn on how to be an effective technical leader. There’s a lot of things that I need to learn. Start learning. And document everything so I can review my learnings later.
-
creating a team blog
Playing super bowl squares is a lot of fun! You actually have to watch the game. And it is fun! I think I might be watching it a bit more next year. Yesterday’s super bowl was really interesting. We were drinking beer, having snacks, and having fun at Pawel’s house. It was a lot of fun.
There is one idea I came up with on Saturday. We have these little bits and pieces that we learn, why not create a team blog and have the team contribute to it? I think that’s going to be a lot of fun, good learning, and perhaps a different culture starter?
-
learning a lot at work
I am learning at work. For pretty much all of my time at m6d I have focused on micro things. I never really cared about the environment, about other things. Well, things have changed! Changed by a lot! Now I am involved in almost every system. It has been a painful process for me. I don’t like a state where I don’t really know how things work. But it has also forced me to look beyond, to learn other systems. Eventually, this will fall into place. Eventually, things will start to make sense. Eventually, I will look back and wonder how I existed without knowing the whole infrastructure.